• Welcome to No Deposit Forum! Please log in to continue. New members please register here. New Member Registration

I LOVE COFFEE, YOU TOO?

omeg

NEW MEMBER
  <big> You Know You're Drinking Too Much Coffee When.... </big>  
You answer the door before people knock. Juan Valdez named his donkey after you. You ski uphill. You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked. You speed walk in your sleep. You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse. You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit. You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. You sleep with your eyes open. You have to watch videos in fast-forward. The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake. You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer. You lick your coffeepot clean. You spend every vacation visiting Maxwell House. You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there. You've worn out your third pair of tennis shoes this week. Your eyes stay open when you sneeze. You chew on other people's fingernails. The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse. Your T-shirt says, Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend. You're so jittery that people use your hands to blend their margaritas. You can type sixty words per minute... with your feet. You can jump-start your car without cables. Cocaine is a downer. All your kids are named Joe . You don't need a hammer to pound nails. Your only source of nutrition comes from Sweet & Low. You don't sweat, you percolate. You buy 1/2 & 1/2 by the barrel. You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug. You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee. You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in. You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them. Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down. You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers. People get dizzy just watching you. You've worn the finish off your coffee table. The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you. Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house. Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp. You're so wired, you pick up AM radio. People can test their batteries in your ears. Your life's goal is to amount to a hill of beans. Instant coffee takes too long. You channel surf faster without a remote. When someone says. How are you? , you say, Good to the last drop. You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can. You want to come back as a coffee mug in your next life. Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil. You'd be willing to spend time in a Turkish prison. You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee. You're offended when people use the word brew to mean beer. You name your cats Cream and Sugar. You get drunk just so you can sober up. You speak perfect Arabic without ever taking a lesson. Your Thermos is on wheels. Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position. You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug. You can outlast the Energizer bunny. You short out motion detectors. You have a conniption over spilled milk. You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore. Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale. You think being called a drip is a compliment. You don't tan, you roast. You don't get mad, you get steamed. Your three favorite things in life are...coffee before, coffee during and coffee after. You can't even remember your second cup. You help your dog chase its tail. You soak your dentures in coffee overnight. Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyds of London. You introduce your spouse as your coffeemate. You think CPR stands for Coffee Provides Resuscitation. Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.  
 
Last edited by a moderator:

PSP

Ruler of Western Civilization's Geeky Nerds
I have MANY vices, but coffee isn't one of them... It just tastes like dirty, stagnant water to me :surprise: Just sayin'......
 

Mben

No Deposit Forum Administrator
Staff member
Dirty and stagnant ? Really? LOL"
I think it tastes delicious. I only have 1 cup, sometimes 2, a day though. I NEED that cup in the morning and then I'm ok the rest of the day. If I don't have it, I feel off the whole day. "
So Pam, how many POTS do you drink a day? lol (no kidding, folks)
 

omeg

NEW MEMBER
My coffee pot is on ............Alllllllllllllll day long.:roll:Thats why I have such a wonderful and cheerful personality all the time. :lol:
 

omeg

NEW MEMBER
Mben?I was just laughing, do you remember that coffee in the room when we were in Vegas?
doh.gif
doh.gif
I went to my room and ordered a fresh pot of coffee from room service just to survive.  Now that was delicious.What did that pot cost Belgamo? $$$$$$ :lol:
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Spa-Rat

WELL KNOWN MEMBER
Those are some funny sayings!I wish I drank coffee, need a pick me up in the morning. Have tried caffiene pills. Not sure how I liked thows. Just can't stand the taste or smell of coffee.Never drank it in my life. Have tried it, yuk. Only hot think I drink is hot chocolate. I guess I never grew up. haha. Still eat the same as when I was a kid too.:no:
 

Mben

No Deposit Forum Administrator
Staff member
PMM2008 wrote: Mben?I was just laughing, do you remember that coffee in the room when we were in Vegas?
doh.gif
doh.gif
I went to my room and ordered a fresh pot of coffee from room service just to survive.  Now that was delicious.What did that pot cost Belgamo? $$$$$$ :lol:
I can't remember exactly, but it did cost a pretty penny. Comped, of course. That's how the boss man rolls! LOLRemember the room's coffee maker? The itty bitty machine and little disposable filter packs? Made one cup at a time. Your coffee maker started smokin' and burst into flames after like the 10th cup of coffee you made in a row in a matter of 10 minutes! :lol: (just joking about the machine catching fire!)
 
Last edited by a moderator:

omeg

NEW MEMBER
You know what? I actually know alot of people who do not drink coffee. My Mother was one of them.  She drank tea.All I know is when the pot is brewing, and I smell it ....my mouth waters. :lol:It is one of thew most delicious drinkis out there to me. Now granted, I do not drink it black, that sh** is nasty. :lol:I have to have a small amount of sugar and cream.  Stir, sip, Heaven.
biggrin.gif
Maybe you should think about trying Tea Spa-Rat. They have so many delicious kinds now. If you try it, use a little sugar and cream.:roll:
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Mben

No Deposit Forum Administrator
Staff member
Spa-Rat wrote: Those are some funny sayings!I wish I drank coffee, need a pick me up in the morning. Have tried caffiene pills. Not sure how I liked thows . Just can't stand the taste or smell of coffee.Never drank it in my life. Have tried it, yuk. Only hot think I drink is hot chocolate. I guess I never grew up. haha. Still eat the same as when I was a kid too.:no:
I drink you need a cup of caffiene this morning! Thows pills aren't cuttin' it for ya!LMFAO! You on a new keyboard, Spa-Rat? -- Edited by Mben on Monday 29th of July 2013 11:40:55 AM
 
Last edited by a moderator:

omeg

NEW MEMBER
Mben wrote:
PMM2008 wrote: Mben?I was just laughing, do you remember that coffee in the room when we were in Vegas?
doh.gif
doh.gif
I went to my room and ordered a fresh pot of coffee from room service just to survive.  Now that was delicious.What did that pot cost Belgamo? $$$$$$ :lol:
I can't remember exactly, but it did cost a pretty penny. Comped, of course. That's how the boss man rolls! LOLRemember the room's coffee maker? The itty bitty machine and little disposable filter packs? Made one cup at a time. Your coffee maker started smokin' and burst into flames after like the 10th cup of coffee you made in a row in a matter of 10 minutes! :lol: (just joking about the machine catching fire!)
 :lol::lol::lol::lol:Oh my goodness that was funny.By the way....You said you would never tell anyone that happened. :lol:You just can't keep a secret.  Guess I'll have to tell folks about that slab of Prime Rib you devourered in Vegas.  The table was speechless, no one could believe it. :fart:hahahahaha
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Mben

No Deposit Forum Administrator
Staff member
PMM2008 wrote:
Mben wrote:
PMM2008 wrote: Mben?I was just laughing, do you remember that coffee in the room when we were in Vegas?
doh.gif
doh.gif
I went to my room and ordered a fresh pot of coffee from room service just to survive.  Now that was delicious.What did that pot cost Belgamo? $$$$$$ :lol:
I can't remember exactly, but it did cost a pretty penny. Comped, of course. That's how the boss man rolls! LOLRemember the room's coffee maker? The itty bitty machine and little disposable filter packs? Made one cup at a time. Your coffee maker started smokin' and burst into flames after like the 10th cup of coffee you made in a row in a matter of 10 minutes! :lol: (just joking about the machine catching fire!)
 :lol::lol::lol::lol:Oh my goodness that was funny.By the way....You said you would never tell anyone that happened. :lol:You just can't keep a secret.  Guess I'll have to tell folks about that slab of Prime Rib you devourered in Vegas.  The table was speechless, no one could believe it. :fart:hahahahaha
OMG! I still have the picture I took of it! It was the biggest piece of meat I've ever had in my life, including what those of you who's minds are in the gutter are imagining right now! LMFAO!!! :laughhard: 
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Spa-Rat

WELL KNOWN MEMBER
Okay, thing, those, caffeine. Should of done a spell check. haha!
 
Last edited by a moderator:

daremeto

WELL KNOWN MEMBER
i love the taste and smell of coffee but i can't drink it anymore. i have this stupid heart condition i was born with it and whenever i drink coffee these days it feels like my heart is going to pound right out of my chest. strange because when i was younger i drank it all day long. i do miss drinking coffee
 

Similar threads

Forum statistics

Threads
36,118
Messages
189,789
Members
20,984
Latest member
rafael1216