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The Man Rules

Discussion in 'GENERAL DISCUSSION' started by PSP, May 5, 2011.

  1. PSP

    PSP Ruler of Western Civilization's Geeky Nerds

    The Man Rules At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down   Finally , the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear the rules   From the female side ....   Now here are the rules from the male side.     These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered 1 ON PURPOSE!   1.   Men are NOT mind readers. ( FIRST & FOREMOST RULE ) 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports or news, It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1.. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the   other one 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.. 1. Captain Cook did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.   1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say nothing, We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really . 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football or Cars. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape.   Round IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh. Pass this to as many women as you can -   to give them a bigger laugh.
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 26, 2014
  2. PSP

    PSP Ruler of Western Civilization's Geeky Nerds

    ... and the corollary:[​IMG]
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 23, 2014
  3. Mben

    Mben No Deposit Forum Admin Staff Member

    PSP, that was hilarious! [​IMG]And after reading through them, I thought to myself You know what? That's right! You guys don't complain that the toilet seat is down! hahaha [​IMG]-- Edited by Mben on Thursday 5th of May 2011 03:25:20 PM
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 23, 2014
  4. omeg

    omeg NEW MEMBER

    [​IMG][​IMG] Oh my goodness....That was funny. Thanks for the post PSP.                                                                                              Pam
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 23, 2014
  5. krystalkitty

    krystalkitty Greedy Gambler

    OMG...guess I gotta take a lesson in speed reading.

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