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What exactly is a \POOPTY\ LOLOL

omeg

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You Might Drive a Poopty (Pimped Out Hoopty) if</h1>by on <abbr class="published" title="2009-07-14">July 14, 2009</abbr>in <a href="http://thefreshxpress.com/category/life/" title="View all posts in Culture & Community">Culture & Community</a> Spread it! Share   <a href="http://www.stumbleupon.com/submit?url=http://thefreshxpress.com/2009/07/you-might-drive-a-poopty-pimped-out-hoopty-if/&title=You Might Drive a Poopty (Pimped Out Hoopty) if" > </a> <a href="mailto:?subject=Sharing: You Might Drive a Poopty (Pimped Out Hoopty) if&body=I wanted to share this with you. Thought you might enjoy it:%0A%0Ahttp://thefreshxpress.com/2009/07/you-might-drive-a-poopty-pimped-out-hoopty-if/" title="Email This">Email This </a> <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-7018" src="http://cdn-two.thefreshxpress.com/freshxp/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/Poopty.jpg" alt="Poopty" title="Poopty" width="604" height="453" /> We have all seen them. The eyesore with the expensive sound system. The florescent orange Impala with the burgundy hood. The 1963 hearse with the words Rollin painted on the side in house paint. Ladies and gentleman this is what I call the Poopty-a pimped out hoopty. Why am I addressing this issue? With the economy in trouble and automakers in ruins we may see an uprising of this obnoxious beast and their proud owners. Here are 5 ways to determine if you or someone you love drives a Poopty: 1. Your car has spinners on it that dont spin due to front-end damage. This one is particularly sad because poopty owners love to show off their rims. But when they try to show you that they spin they get stuck mid way and the poopty owner has to help it along like a sick puppy. He or she may even talk to it. i.e. You can do it. 2. The drivers side seat is stuck in the lean position. This one may appear to be normal. You may think that the poopty owner is leaning so as to look cool. But you would be wrong. He is leaning because the pooptys previous owner was rather large (no offense to anyone of any size, shape, or skin color intended) and therefore the seat has been broken into this position. 3. The hydraulics system or Juice installed only hits one switch. This is another one that isnt obvious. While attempting to fit in at the local carwash with the non-poopty drivers a poopty owner may hide this by hitting the same switch over and over. If asked why their poopty only does one trick they may say its stuck and will be repaired soon. Do not press this issue. Pooty owners will blame everyone from the person who installed it to the government for this problem. Just let it go. 4. One side of the car is in mint condition while the other side is totaled By all appearances looking at the fresh candy red paint job the car looks normal and pristine. It is only after the poopty makes a left turn do you discover the truth. The other side is twisted and mangled simulating the kind of damage that can only be created in Hollywood. Poopty owners compensate for this by making right turns as often as possible. 5. Car looks to be in perfect condition but has windows and doors that dont open or they dont close. This is another hard one to detect until you see the poopty owners Mother or Grandmother sliding out the passenger side window. Poopty owners may claim that these matriarchs like to get in and out Dukes of Hazzard style. But this is a bold faced lie.Warning: If you are forced to ride with a poopty owner in the winter be advised you may need to supply plastic bags and duck tape so as to beat the frigid air that will be blasting through the window while the poopty owner drives through neighborhoods doing 60 in a 35. Reason: Poopty owners are reckless, as they know they have nothing to lose.If you recognize that you are a pooty owner or you know someone who is here is a word of advice-the money wasted into pimping out a hoopty could have probably bought you a brand new car. Im sure GM would appreciate the business. 
Hoopty.jpg
-- Edited by PMM2008 on Monday 26th of September 2011 07:16:45 PM
 
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