Real Questions Asked on the Butterball Turkey Cooking Hotline

[omeg]

Real Questions Asked on the Butterball Turkey Cooking Hotline 1.Is it OK to baste my turkey with engine oil?2.Can I poke holes all over the turkey and pour a can of beer over it to keep it moist?3.Should I carve my turkey with a 16in Redmax or should I get out my Stihl Electric Chain Saw?4.How do I get my Chihuahua out of the turkey. (Her dog jumped up on the kitchen table.)5.Should I leave the giblets in their plastic bag during cooking?6.I'm a truck driver. Can I cook the turkey on the engine block of my semi while I'm driving? If I drive faster, will it cook faster?7.How long should I cook my turkey on the car radiator? 50 minutes at Mach 1 should do it!

 

[Mben]

Really people?!?!?!?The chihuahua in the turkey is hilarious! I can see it!